The Moody Grays

Not too many people in the medical industry talk about this side of diabetes. I call it the "Moody Grays". Other people call it depression.

For me, its not the end of the world. There isn't any of the wanting to curl up and die, or shut the whole world out. I get up. I go. I do. Its just that on those days, its like the whole world is a moving sepia picture, or its like black & white television.

I don't know why counseling isn't built into an endocrinology practice that focuses on diabetes. It should be - and I say this as someone with a deep and profound mistrust of all therapists.

This disease is HARD. Medical professionals try to be positive, and give the impression that its just follow the formula and all will be well.

That's true - and its not.

I've had days where I exercised and ate right and did what I was supposed to do and had perfect blood sugars all day. It was great! Then there are the days where I do everything right, and my blood sugar won't drop below 300. Might be stress. Might be an illness coming on. Might be the wind? No clue. You can do everything right, and still not have control, and with this disease, control is absolutely essential.

After more than 27 years with this, I'm tired. I'm tired of trying to explain to my endocrinologist why my blood sugar was out of control 3 months ago. I'm tired of wondering what the hell I did to have it spike up. Not every day, and not all the time, but yeah, I'm tired enough that I have a hard time seeing the color & sparkle of the world around me.

The Moody Grays.

For more info:
Deppression & Diabetes