Yesterday was pretty good. Stuck to my diet. Not too much to say other than that.
Still having trouble shaking the "moody grays". Why is it that I can have a day where nothing goes wrong, and it still feels as though everything did?
Bleh. That's what I have to say about it.
Tuesday, July 24, 2012
Monday, July 23, 2012
Checking In - Its been a while. . .
Its been a while. I fell of the diet, and now I'm getting back onto it.
So, what happened?
Well, I got sick. Still not certain if it was emotional or physical causes. At this point, it doesn't matter. I had diarrhea for 10 days straight (WAY too long). I was vomiting as well, which isn't good. Then I got depressed.
Depression is not something I tolerate well. Oh, its fine in other people. I simply have no patience for it in myself. I do my best to fight it, and up until this past June, I think I succeed pretty well.
Not this time. This time, I fell flat on my face. While I was doing that, my life partners also nose-dived in for a swim in the depression pool. Then I got angry at myself for falling into a depression and well, it got messy. Its been not pretty in my house for almost 2 months.
I'm done with that. I'm done with being tired & sick.
I'm back on my smoothies. I'm back to my veggies. Bronnie is helping a TON. She went back on anti-depressants. She's helping me avoid going on them (for myriad reasons, not the least of which is I'm on enough damned medication already). By next week, I'm hoping to be back to yoga in the AM & walks in the afternoon.
So, how bad did it get?
My blood sugar is a MESS. My weight is not. Personally, I'd rather that were the other way around, but I'll still take it, and be grateful. I've not lost all the ground I'd gained, and in fact, my weight is 1lb. less than my best so far. I'm currently at 227, and hopefully my blood sugar will come right back into line.
So, I'm checking in. Going to start tracking & blogging again.
I'm back. I'm bruised & battered (by myself, and mostly my pride) but I'm here & I'm moving forward again.
So, what happened?
Well, I got sick. Still not certain if it was emotional or physical causes. At this point, it doesn't matter. I had diarrhea for 10 days straight (WAY too long). I was vomiting as well, which isn't good. Then I got depressed.
Depression is not something I tolerate well. Oh, its fine in other people. I simply have no patience for it in myself. I do my best to fight it, and up until this past June, I think I succeed pretty well.
Not this time. This time, I fell flat on my face. While I was doing that, my life partners also nose-dived in for a swim in the depression pool. Then I got angry at myself for falling into a depression and well, it got messy. Its been not pretty in my house for almost 2 months.
I'm done with that. I'm done with being tired & sick.
I'm back on my smoothies. I'm back to my veggies. Bronnie is helping a TON. She went back on anti-depressants. She's helping me avoid going on them (for myriad reasons, not the least of which is I'm on enough damned medication already). By next week, I'm hoping to be back to yoga in the AM & walks in the afternoon.
So, how bad did it get?
My blood sugar is a MESS. My weight is not. Personally, I'd rather that were the other way around, but I'll still take it, and be grateful. I've not lost all the ground I'd gained, and in fact, my weight is 1lb. less than my best so far. I'm currently at 227, and hopefully my blood sugar will come right back into line.
So, I'm checking in. Going to start tracking & blogging again.
I'm back. I'm bruised & battered (by myself, and mostly my pride) but I'm here & I'm moving forward again.
Tuesday, June 19, 2012
Not Wonderful
I'm having a rough week. Haven't broken diet, but am having some serious issues. Still poo-ing my brains out, added some panic induced vomiting into the mix. I'm a big emo mess right now.
I'm still keeping track of food intake & numbers & such, and intend to report in on a day when I don't spend half or more of said day shaking in my shoes from panic.
Life is stressful, and I've stopped self-medicating with food.
I'm still keeping track of food intake & numbers & such, and intend to report in on a day when I don't spend half or more of said day shaking in my shoes from panic.
Life is stressful, and I've stopped self-medicating with food.
Monday, June 18, 2012
The Weekend & Checking In
There are no crunchy bits for this post. Its ALL froo-froo.
This past weekend I was sick. I'd been sick most of the week, hadn't slept solidly all week, and thus, took the weekend off. From everything.
I rested. I played a video game & then rested some more. I'm feeling a bit better now, and I'm glad I did it.
On the up side, I've lost four more pounts. I now weigh 228.5 for a total of 18 pounds lost. This is happy making.
So that's my weekend & check it.
This past weekend I was sick. I'd been sick most of the week, hadn't slept solidly all week, and thus, took the weekend off. From everything.
I rested. I played a video game & then rested some more. I'm feeling a bit better now, and I'm glad I did it.
On the up side, I've lost four more pounts. I now weigh 228.5 for a total of 18 pounds lost. This is happy making.
So that's my weekend & check it.
Thursday, June 14, 2012
Tuesday 06/12 & Wednesday 06/13
The Crunchy Bits:
06/12
Blood Pressure 122/79
Pulse 84
Blood Sugars
5:15 AM 64
10:30 AM 107
12:00 PM 109
no bs
no bs
no bs
Breakfast Breakfast smoothie
Snack Swiss chard salad w/ 1/4 cucumber, 1/4 beet, 1/2 avocado & 2 tbsp of vinegerette
Lunch 1 c dal w/ 3/4 c almonds
Snack 3 celery stalks, 1/2 cucumber & 1/4 c. almond butter
Dinner 2 scrambled eggs
Exercise AM Yoga, 15 min walk
06/13
Blood Pressure 132/84
Pulse 96
Blood Sugars 6:45 AM 44
10:00 AM 56
12:00 PM 81
4:00 PM 97
8:00 PM 68
Breakfast 1/4 c pineapple, 1/4 c almonds
Snack breakfast smoothie
Lunch 1c dal, 1/4 c almonds, 1/4 c guacamole, 1.5 celery stalks
Snack 1/4 c. guacamole, 1.5 celery stalks & 1/2 cucumber
Dinner 4 oz tilapia, dinner smoothie, 1 c steamed broccoli
Exercise 15 min walk
The Froo-Froo Bits:
Tuesday afternoon I got SICK. I was running to the bathroom every 10 min for a while. Then every 5. Then I tapered off enough to get home (thank whatever gods may be!), and it all started up again in the middle of the night. I finally go back to bed around 3:30 AM.
So, my schedule was SHOT!! I still kept mostly on diet, and routine, though I did skip yoga yesterday. Still, I managed well, with no serious highs and only one serious low (didn't lose consciousness, but did get odd tingles in my hands & feet).
So, I gave myself yesterday off from blogging. Why? Because there are just some times when its ill advised to interact with the world any more than absolutely necessary. Yesterday was one of those times.
06/12
Blood Pressure 122/79
Pulse 84
Blood Sugars
5:15 AM 64
10:30 AM 107
12:00 PM 109
no bs
no bs
no bs
Breakfast Breakfast smoothie
Snack Swiss chard salad w/ 1/4 cucumber, 1/4 beet, 1/2 avocado & 2 tbsp of vinegerette
Lunch 1 c dal w/ 3/4 c almonds
Snack 3 celery stalks, 1/2 cucumber & 1/4 c. almond butter
Dinner 2 scrambled eggs
Exercise AM Yoga, 15 min walk
06/13
Blood Pressure 132/84
Pulse 96
Blood Sugars 6:45 AM 44
10:00 AM 56
12:00 PM 81
4:00 PM 97
8:00 PM 68
Breakfast 1/4 c pineapple, 1/4 c almonds
Snack breakfast smoothie
Lunch 1c dal, 1/4 c almonds, 1/4 c guacamole, 1.5 celery stalks
Snack 1/4 c. guacamole, 1.5 celery stalks & 1/2 cucumber
Dinner 4 oz tilapia, dinner smoothie, 1 c steamed broccoli
Exercise 15 min walk
The Froo-Froo Bits:
Tuesday afternoon I got SICK. I was running to the bathroom every 10 min for a while. Then every 5. Then I tapered off enough to get home (thank whatever gods may be!), and it all started up again in the middle of the night. I finally go back to bed around 3:30 AM.
So, my schedule was SHOT!! I still kept mostly on diet, and routine, though I did skip yoga yesterday. Still, I managed well, with no serious highs and only one serious low (didn't lose consciousness, but did get odd tingles in my hands & feet).
So, I gave myself yesterday off from blogging. Why? Because there are just some times when its ill advised to interact with the world any more than absolutely necessary. Yesterday was one of those times.
Tuesday, June 12, 2012
Monday 06/11
The Crunchy Bits:
Weight 232.5
Blood Pressure 131/82
Pulse 90
Blood Sugars
5:00 AM 130
12:00 PM 190
4:00 PM 130
8:00 PM 75
Breakfast Breakfast Smoothie
Snack
Lunch Swiss chard salad w/ 1/4 cucumber, 1/4 beet, 1/2 avocado & 2 tbsp of vinegerette
1 c dal
Snack 1/4 c almond butter, 3 celery stalks & 1/2 cucumber
Dinner 4 oz tilapia & dinner smoothie
Exercise AM Yoga, 20 min walk
The Froo-Froo Bits:
This was a good day, despite its start. I had a "purge" day. I went to the bathroom 7 times before noon. Yeah. 'Nuff said about THAT. Other than that, and the late start to the day that it caused, this was a good day.
We tried something new. We split up the bitter melon, and I ate half in a my breakfast smoothie & half with a dinner smoothie. Bitter melon is VERY bitter, and also very odd textured. Mr. Primack advises that all diabetics eat half in the AM and half later in the day. We'd been putting all of it in the morning, and we've decided that its okay to have smoothie twice a day. My hope is that by splitting up the bitter melon, I'll be able to reduce my insulin even more. Maybe. We'll see, won't we.
Weight 232.5
Blood Pressure 131/82
Pulse 90
Blood Sugars
5:00 AM 130
12:00 PM 190
4:00 PM 130
8:00 PM 75
Breakfast Breakfast Smoothie
Snack
Lunch Swiss chard salad w/ 1/4 cucumber, 1/4 beet, 1/2 avocado & 2 tbsp of vinegerette
1 c dal
Snack 1/4 c almond butter, 3 celery stalks & 1/2 cucumber
Dinner 4 oz tilapia & dinner smoothie
Exercise AM Yoga, 20 min walk
The Froo-Froo Bits:
This was a good day, despite its start. I had a "purge" day. I went to the bathroom 7 times before noon. Yeah. 'Nuff said about THAT. Other than that, and the late start to the day that it caused, this was a good day.
We tried something new. We split up the bitter melon, and I ate half in a my breakfast smoothie & half with a dinner smoothie. Bitter melon is VERY bitter, and also very odd textured. Mr. Primack advises that all diabetics eat half in the AM and half later in the day. We'd been putting all of it in the morning, and we've decided that its okay to have smoothie twice a day. My hope is that by splitting up the bitter melon, I'll be able to reduce my insulin even more. Maybe. We'll see, won't we.
Cravings
I'm having a wicked cravings day. It has nothing to do with hunger. I've eaten. My stomach is filled with veggies & I've had enough for this point in the day. This is an emotional craving, and I'm pretty certain its simply for familiar food. I want a cheeseburger on a toasty bun, tater tots with ketchup, and a cup of strong coffee. All of it bad for me in one way or another, but its all FAMILIAR.
I've been making a lot of changes, and those have led to other changes. I feel right now like I'm flailing around looking for a recognizable landmark in unfamiliar territory. There aren't any, and so. . .cheeseburger.
I'm not going there, but by all the gods you care to invoke, I REALLY want to.
I've been making a lot of changes, and those have led to other changes. I feel right now like I'm flailing around looking for a recognizable landmark in unfamiliar territory. There aren't any, and so. . .cheeseburger.
I'm not going there, but by all the gods you care to invoke, I REALLY want to.
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